Ever since I can remember, which on some days is only as far back as yesterday, but on others all the way back to childhood, I ave been smiler. As a kid it started as my mask so no one would ask me what was wrong. Behind that inspiration was also the genuine desire to make people happy.

On this National Smile Day I am peeling back the layers of my relationship with smiling. I find it a bit befuddling that there is a national day for this, as there is a national day for everything it seems, but I won’t get psychological and will simply share my history with the wonderful expression between the lips.

Growing up in a home with a mentally ill father I didn’t want to add more weight to the heaviness of our home life so I put on a smile. At least that’s what I remember wearing when I left the house and walked down the street or down the school hallway. As I got older my smiles were interpreted as flirtatious. That always weirded me out. Not flirting people just being kind, offering a little lift to your day, don’t take it as having meaning, only receive it for what it is, a smile. I kept at it though and would take it super personally when strangers or even friends wouldn’t smile back. Internalizing that it had something to do with me, but still not giving up my smile.

I did go through a very brief period of withholding my smiles, then that felt weirder than the flirtatious interpretation, and I just said, Screw it, I am a smiler, take it or leave it.

I have had some of the most amazing connections with strangers not only through giving them a smile, but from receiving theirs. I recall my biggest take away from Elizabeth Gilbert’s book Eat, Pray, Love was to smile during meditation. I do that now. I smile while I meditate, it changes everything. 

I smile driving down the street, walking through the grocery store aisles. Smiling doesn’t need a reason or a special holiday.

I am not attached to the response of the one I am smiling to, unhinged to their reaction and this dear cup holder, changes everything. I am not the little girl wearing a mask, I am the woman offering a gift and receiving its abundant blessings unattached to the outcome. I know I can’t make another happy, but I can be a ripple of love, starting with a smile. And frankly my dear this world needs it, not just today, every day. 

Refill Challenge: Smile in the mirror EVERY day at yourself, then pass on the gift to another.

Cheers, Jenny