I remember the morning clearly. It was September, ten years ago, maybe nine, and my children and I were on the street corner by the Douglas Fir or was it the Japanese Maple? Maybe near the Safeway, or maybe near the elementary school across from Safeway. It was the northeast, wait northwest corner, and Sonya was waiting to cross the street. A mutual friend told me I should meet Sonya because she too, was a writer.

 

“Hi, you are Sonya, I am Jenny and we both are writers and my friend Sydney (or was it Erika), said we should meet.”

 

So I may not remember the exact date or every word I said, but what I know is that by taking a risk and introducing myself to a stranger I now have a writing partner for the las ten, maybe nine years. Every Thursday we meet, brew a pot of tea and write. We support each other in our number one passion. The love of writing brought us together and our continued accountability keeps us coming back. Living a block and a half (this I know for sure, I measured) from one another getting makes meeting up easy. I walk down the alley to her house and the next week she walks to mine. (ok, we sometimes drive if we have an appointment before or after.)

 

We don’t call it accountability, for now it is habit. It is ritual. It is vital to our well-being. It has become a way of living. Our writing together is one way we take care of ourselves, honor the thing we MUST do. It started by setting a date and time then showing up to the other. Our friendship is a bonus that grew out of starting something new and sticking to it.

 

I don’t know the reason behind being more reliable when it comes to showing up for others versus showing up to ourselves. We easily let ourselves down by saying, Oh, I will start writing when the kids are older. Or, I will get to that thing I love tomorrow, when I have time. When we have an appointment on the calendar, we show up, we don’t want to leave someone standing on the corner. I am not concerned about the why, I am more in awe and grateful for the showing up, regardless if it is because someone is waiting. If that’s what it takes, great. Then make a date and show up.

 

This nine or ten year accountability has birthed so much joy, expression, creativity, not to mention the publication of Sonya’s book (www.sonyaelliott.com) and numerous blogs from us both. Every Thursday, rain or shine I will release the cork to my artist expression and fill the blank page. I will laugh, sometimes cry, be heard, listen, do the thing I must do. Sometimes we need a partner, a witness, a helping hand, so for this I am grateful for Sonya. I am grateful for showing up to one another because in the process it has allowed me to show up to myself. For me, myself and I.

 

Need a partner, look around, notice, ask. Find that person who can be the name you write on the calendar and the reason you put on the kettle. Showing up to the other, honoring yourself.

Cheers, Jenny