My son has a friend coming home with him after school so last night I say to him standing in the middle of his messy, chaotic room,”If you have time in the morning would you consider picking up your room before school?”

He takes a breath,”I will do what I can, mom.” He crawls into his bed and we say our routine words, share and connect like always. As I leave his room, he gently says,”Mom, I probably won’t have time to clean my room in the morning. And I am okay with it this way. Just like I need to get over my fears and worries you could get over your tidiness.”

I smiled. How could I take offense? “You are right buddy. Done. I have let your room go, I am sure E has seen a messy room before.” I closed the door, aware of my grateful heart.

Because I had truly let the room go realizing it was my agenda and not life threatening to have a friend see a messy room, nor life giving to stress about, my son’s words surprised me this morning.

“Hey, mama I picked up my room, I just left my pile of clean clothes and there might be some food in my soccer bag.”

“I thought we were letting the room go?”

“I had time and so I just did it.”

I grinned to myself and did an internal happy dance. Look what happens when I let go? When I release the control reins of my agenda.

Is the order of your kid’s room a sore spot? A bone of contention? A battle you won’t give up? It has been for me and our youngest. Order is my thing. My priority. I can teach our son, I can model, but in the end the only thing that works is letting go. And closing the door doesn’t hurt.

Cheers, Jenny